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NYC Subway
If you're a New Yorker you may understand this a bit better then if you've never ridden the New York City Subways. To help you understand, most of us New Yorkers use the subways to commute to work and back home.
Most of us have to endure daily events such as being cheek to cheek with other men and women (rush hour), being around smelly people, listening to the homeless beg for money, seeing people eat in front of you, and of course the fights that occur from people not wanting to be touched.
I'm usually the kind of person that won't rush to a seat because I know every other person will be looking to get it, so I make my way to the sides to read my newspaper. There are certain stops along the way home that basically empty out the car I'm riding in so I then proceed to sit down.
Yesterday I worked a long day and actually didn't even get to eat lunch. By the time I was going home it was 7:45 p.m and I was dead tired. The train pulls up to a station and it gets emptied out. I proceeded to take a seat and began reading my newspaper.
At this point the station that emptied everyone out, also filled up the car again because it's one of the central stops on my route. I felt an old lady sit next to me, but I didn't look up or next to me. I was too deep into the "Voice of the people" section of the newspaper. Not to mention I had my iPod blasting Pantera....so I couldn't hear crap.
As the train proceeded it's route, I glanced up and noticed this woman (around her late 40's, early 50's) staring at me, giving me the coldest look on the planet. I quickly realized that she had been expecting me to get up and give her my seat.
Normally I'm more than a gentleman on the subways. So much so that I never take a seat and allow all the women and men to sit down. Now....this is where it gets interesting. Had I looked up from the beginning, I might have gotten up and said to the lady "would you like a seat?". Because my head was deep into the newspaper I didn't notice anyone around me. What was I supposed to do at this point?
I bet you're thinking I should of gotten up and still asked the lady if she wanted a seat. Well... NO, that didn't happen. I would gladly give up my seat to any pregnant woman, elderly woman, or disabled person. This lady didn't fit any of those descriptions AND she gave me a dirty look. Now more than ever I was NOT going to get up. If she hadn't EXPECTED me to get up, I might have then gotten up just to be my normal gentleman self.
While I do agree that most men or young people will see elderly people and make pretend they're not there, when is it okay to be tired yourself and deserve some rest? Man, I'm not a 20 year old kid anymore and I do sometimes get tired myself.
Am I wrong here? Regardless of how tired I am, should I always give up my seat to anyone and everyone who expects it?
If you're not from New York, you'd have to see how nasty people are on the subways... Then you might understand my anger/confusion.
Here's an example of how people treat the subways:
Most of us have to endure daily events such as being cheek to cheek with other men and women (rush hour), being around smelly people, listening to the homeless beg for money, seeing people eat in front of you, and of course the fights that occur from people not wanting to be touched.
I'm usually the kind of person that won't rush to a seat because I know every other person will be looking to get it, so I make my way to the sides to read my newspaper. There are certain stops along the way home that basically empty out the car I'm riding in so I then proceed to sit down.
Yesterday I worked a long day and actually didn't even get to eat lunch. By the time I was going home it was 7:45 p.m and I was dead tired. The train pulls up to a station and it gets emptied out. I proceeded to take a seat and began reading my newspaper.
At this point the station that emptied everyone out, also filled up the car again because it's one of the central stops on my route. I felt an old lady sit next to me, but I didn't look up or next to me. I was too deep into the "Voice of the people" section of the newspaper. Not to mention I had my iPod blasting Pantera....so I couldn't hear crap.
As the train proceeded it's route, I glanced up and noticed this woman (around her late 40's, early 50's) staring at me, giving me the coldest look on the planet. I quickly realized that she had been expecting me to get up and give her my seat.
Normally I'm more than a gentleman on the subways. So much so that I never take a seat and allow all the women and men to sit down. Now....this is where it gets interesting. Had I looked up from the beginning, I might have gotten up and said to the lady "would you like a seat?". Because my head was deep into the newspaper I didn't notice anyone around me. What was I supposed to do at this point?
I bet you're thinking I should of gotten up and still asked the lady if she wanted a seat. Well... NO, that didn't happen. I would gladly give up my seat to any pregnant woman, elderly woman, or disabled person. This lady didn't fit any of those descriptions AND she gave me a dirty look. Now more than ever I was NOT going to get up. If she hadn't EXPECTED me to get up, I might have then gotten up just to be my normal gentleman self.
While I do agree that most men or young people will see elderly people and make pretend they're not there, when is it okay to be tired yourself and deserve some rest? Man, I'm not a 20 year old kid anymore and I do sometimes get tired myself.
Am I wrong here? Regardless of how tired I am, should I always give up my seat to anyone and everyone who expects it?
If you're not from New York, you'd have to see how nasty people are on the subways... Then you might understand my anger/confusion.
Here's an example of how people treat the subways:
posted by Jeff at Friday, June 17, 2005
7 Comments:
Anyon who expects you to give them your seat...can just go fuck themselves.
Can you tell that I've ridden NYC's finest subways?
LOL....
Looks like you know what i'm talkin' bout!
To that wench, I would've been like, "Oh..'for persons with disabilities'. Here you go, retard!"
OK, it's highly unlikely that I would actually say this but it would definitely have put a smile on my face...as I read my paper and listened to my iPod---while I sat there.
a busy and packed transit system is what we also have here in Toronto. but u make sense when you ask that question "when is it okay to be tired yourself and deserve some rest?". i guess some people would argue that it doesn't matter if you're tired, chivalry is unconditional.
but here is an example of the bigotry of women! They cry "equal rights" all the time but in situations like this, they still expect men to be chivalrous. i think that unless they are elderly,pregnant or have a disability, women and men that fall out of that category should just endure that long commute standing up.
Donna: I think you hit the nail on the head with your comment. I forgot about all the crying women do about equal rights and equal treatment. Now it's time to stand up and face the music.
Only now have I made the wonderful discovery of your beautiful, noir blog! I shall be back frequently!
Claire: Of course my blog is no way near as eloquant as yours, but your precense is always welcomed.
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